When you're little, the world is a brand new place to you. Every day, you discover something new, and some of those things are horrifying.related: laptoponbedphobia
Eventually you learn to face your fears and stand up to that ceiling fan that's been pushing you around all that time... or just realizing that most of these little things are of no harm, but when you're like 3 years old, and you've just gained consciousness 3 weeks ago, things are a little scary.
Yeah, I'm not gonna brush that off. The ceiling fan. When I was little, our living room had a ceiling fan. Yeah, a big, scary, spinning row of knives!!! When I was little I would refuse to spend time underneath that fan, cause I was sure that it's secret plan was to one day fall of the ceiling and chop me to pieces, but my parents assured me that there's nothing to be scared of the thing that brutally murdered the balloon that I accidentally let float onto the ceiling.
It doesn't help, years later being bored watching fail videos on youtube like an idiot, there's this one video where this fan's gone and gained sentience to jump off the ceiling and try and murder some dude sleepin' on the couch! Seeing this video did not help with anything.
When I was little, y'know still in my crib (I told you, I only remember useless things!!!) we had this stupid rechargeable vacuum, like the crappy cheap version of a Dyson or something. My mom charged that thing overnight, and since my room was closest to the living room and kitchen, she plugged in the charger in my room. That charger had a little red LED, so I'm like 3 years old, its the middle of the night, it's pitch black, I can't see a thing except this small ominous red light in the unperceetable distance. When I was little I knew that when robots get mad, their eyes turn red, everyone knows that, and that little red light, in the middle of the night, was 100% a robot that's gone mad, and is on it's way to kill me, and I didn't even know why, I hadn't done anything wrong, leave me alone!!!
But eventually, I spilled a bunch of goldfish cracker crumbs on the floor, and when my mom went to vacuum them up, that stupid nightmare vacuum was dead.
So when I was little, we had this HP desktop computer. I don't remember much about it, but I know it was silver, it had a silver NEC monitor, a black keyboard and black Logitech mouse, which I still use on my main PC.
One thing I remember about that PC, other than Jumpstart, Hoyle Puzzle Games, The Incredible Machine, Top 30 Games 4 Kids and Macromedia Flash Player 6, was a game called "E-Mazing Mazes". Now, I thought this game was pretty awesome. They had cool mazes about Sharks and Planets, and a fricken impossible game where you have to run from monsters in a maze. All those were 2D mazes, and they were awesome, but one thing that I hated was the "3D maze".
There was no other title, not "Sharks Maze", "Planet Adventure", it was just "3D maze".
You click on the button to enter, and the screen goes blank.
Fullscreen scares the crap out of me to this day. I hate seeing the black screen, and the split second of a black and white desktop smashed into 640x480. It makes me feel like, "the Windows Desktop as you know it has been destroyed, there is no going back. You have entered… the 3D maze…".
Okay, developers working on a kids game in 2001, they did not have to make this game SO SCARY!!!
After being traumatized by the death of the Windows Desktop, you are immediately forced into a completely new environment. Floating in the middle of space, standing on a bunch of blue cubes, like the spaceship dropped you off here, and has left you behind, long forgotten. You're the only one, alone in space, nothing but the ambient "hmmmmm" and the sound of your own footsteps. You are now forced to complete barely possible mazes to even try your chance at returning home.
Eventually like a 5 year old, I obliterated that Windows install with random programs and crap, and my parents got mad as hell, and thought the PC was "broken" so they got rid of it :/ for years and years my brother blamed me for "destroying" the computer, over this "virus" that I "installed".
What about this "virus", it was the Realtek 3D audio test.
Holy crap, this thing scared me so much. I had no understanding of what the hell is even going on here. Look at this guy, where are his limbs? Where is this? How did he get here? Who did this to him? Why? Why is there a ball hovering around him? What is the ball doing? Is it hurting him?
I had so many questions and no answers and it was too much for me to handle when I was like 5 years old.
At least I know I'm not exactly alone here.
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